okay pat passed out under dana's car
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
