Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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