Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
I'm jealous of your bromance
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Randomize
