All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
