They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
