Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize