But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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