it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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