Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Randomize
