so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
