Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
