just tell him i said nine months
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
