Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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