i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
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