also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
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