She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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