absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
Randomize
