It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
So much Jack, so little girl.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
