Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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