I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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