bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
i believe in u and ur pee
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize