There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
