DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Randomize
