Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
