bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
