who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize