Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
