so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
