you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Randomize