I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
