plz talk dirty to me
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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