so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
