worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize