Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
