I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
