sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
