plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
