I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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