I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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