could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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