I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just gift wrapped bread.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
