maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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