Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
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