apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
please come you make the beer taste better
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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