Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
