Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
