Clothes are such an inconvenience.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize