i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
