quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize