i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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