I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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