yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Randomize
